Forgiveness says you are given another chance to make a new beginning.
— Desmond Tutu
Dearest Lekz,
I know what happened a few days ago felt like the end of something beautiful. It was painful, wasn’t it? But you know deep in your heart that it had to happen. You needed to recognize the part that you played, to let go of your assumptions about other people.
You had to enter that inner place where you kept all that darkness locked ~ where shame, rage, and resentment hid, making you feel heavy in mind and body. It wasn’t the “ideal" part of you that you wanted to see, yet what you found there was true.
It’s okay. Let yourself feel them ~ these emotions you believed were unacceptable growing up. You’ve kept them hidden for so long that you felt empty, a mere shell for others to fill with their expectations and projections. To feel intensely and to think deeply are your strengths. I hope you realize this.
Cry it out, dear one. Let those tears you’ve bottled up flow freely now. You’re not weak for the storm of your emotions, for the chaos of your thoughts. The very same things you thought crippled you enable you to feel wonder and find joy in the simple, everyday things.
So breathe. You are human ~ allowed to make mistakes and learn from them. From now on, please show yourself the same kindness and compassion you offer to others. Because, what did you learn? Everything begins from yourself ⁓ especially forgiveness.
Always,
Lekz
Honoring Letting Go
Global Forgiveness Day is a yearly observance celebrated every July 7th, dedicated to promoting forgiveness and reconciliation on a worldwide scale. Founded in 1994 by the CECA (Christian Embassy of Christ’s Ambassadors), it originally started in Canada and gained popularity throughout the world.
On this day, we are enjoined to reflect on our own experiences of forgiveness and the benefits these bring. It is a shared moment to acknowledge the transformative power that forgiveness can bring to us, our relationships, and different societies. The importance of recognizing and letting go of anger, bitterness, and the desire for revenge — and choosing forgiveness as a means to restore harmony and peace — are honored as life-changing, personal decisions.
This day also emphasizes the need for forgiveness on a greater scale to address societal divisions and strife. It promotes the world-view that forgiveness is a powerful tool for conflict resolution, reconciliation, and building sustainable peace. By forgiving past wrongs, individuals and societies can break free from the cycles of violence, resentment, and retaliation — all for fostering a global culture of understanding, empathy, and unity.
Celebrating this day includes various activities and initiatives aimed at spreading awareness about the importance of forgiveness. These include public meetings, workshops, dialogues, and educational programs that explore the concept and its practical applications. Individuals and organizations also use this day to extend apologies, seek forgiveness, and make amends for their past transgressions.
Ultimately, Global Forgiveness Day serves as a call to action, encouraging each of us to embrace forgiveness as a healing element in our lives and communities. It invites everyone to recognize the interconnectedness of humanity, to consider different lived experiences, and to promote understanding, compassion, and reconciliation as pathways towards a more supportive and harmonious coexistence.
Starting From Within
How many of us find it easy to forgive others, yet berate ourselves for our own mistakes? We hasten to express compassion and support when a loved one is struggling, yet fail to offer kindness and grace to ourselves. To be able to forgive someone else wholeheartedly, we must nurture our capacity to recognize our own missteps, recalibrate, and begin again. We cannot continuously give from a dwindling cup.
Self-forgiveness is a crucial aspect of our personal growth, healing, and emotional well-being. Letting go of self-blame, guilt, and shame for past mistakes or shortcomings — and embracing compassion, understanding, and acceptance towards oneself — are its key elements. The importance of self-forgiveness cannot be over-emphasized, as it has profound effects on our mental, emotional, and even physical health.
First and foremost, self-forgiveness allows us to release the eroding burden of guilt and shame that often accompanies past mistakes. Holding onto these negative emotions can be detrimental to our self-esteem, self-worth, and overall well-being. By forgiving ourselves, we can untether from the constant self-criticism and self-judgment that hinder our personal growth and happiness.
It also promotes self-compassion and self-love. It involves recognizing our inherent worthiness and understanding that making mistakes is a natural to being human. By extending the same compassion and kindness as we would towards a loved one, we can nurture ourselves.
Moreover, self-forgiveness encourages self-reflection and introspection which lead to personal insight and a deeper understanding of our own values, beliefs, and behaviors. Our past experiences become stepping stones towards transformation, as we consciously improve by making better choices in the future.
It likewise offers physical health benefits. Research has shown that holding onto guilt and self-blame can contribute to increased stress levels, a weakened immune system, and higher risk of mental health issues such as anxiety and depression. By forgiving ourselves, we can reduce stress, improve our emotional well-being, and enhance our overall physical health. It is a powerful act of self-care and a vital ingredient for leading a fulfilling and balanced life.
Nurturing Tools
One of the reasons I value my fountain pen journey is how it has become a pathway for introspection. I began experimenting with fountain pens, inks, and paper to harness my creativity — then writing by hand was adopted as an empowering self-care ritual instrumental to my personal growth. All those entangled thoughts knotted with emotions unravel within that liminal space. And the physical experience of articulating them greatly aids in the process of seeking-transforming myself.
Journaling is a powerful method that supports the development of self-forgiveness. By writing down your thoughts and feelings, you are able to explore your emotions, gain clarity, and encourage self-reflection. These are the ways by which journaling specifically fuels the process of self-forgiveness —
Emotional Release – It provides a safe space to express pent-up emotions. When you write about your feelings of guilt, shame, or self-blame, you ease the weight of these burdens and create moments for forgiveness and healing.
Self-reflection – Through it, you can examine the reasons behind your actions and behaviors. You gain insights into your motives, beliefs, and values — which lead to a deeper understanding of yourself and your mistakes. This helps you cultivate empathy and compassion.
Perspective Shift – Writing down your experiences and challenges fosters an objective perspective. When you revisit your past actions through journaling, you recognize your growth, acknowledge your intentions, and reframe your narratives. This shift in perspective encourages self-forgiveness by highlighting personal growth and progress.
Affirmations and Positive Reinforcement - It provides opportunities to temper self-critical thoughts with self-affirming statements. By consciously writing positive affirmations and focusing on self-compassion, you can rewire your mindset and cultivate forgiveness.
Tracking Progress – By documenting your journey of self-forgiveness, you can appreciate how far you've come and celebrate your achievements. This process reinforces self-compassion and nurtures continued growth.
Your fountain pens, inks, and paper act as supportive and non-judgmental companions along the path to self-forgiveness. When adopted as a habit, journaling becomes a mindful practice towards self-awareness.
From Within Outwards
Much like love, the measure of our capacity to forgive others is influenced by our ability to forgive ourselves. When we understand how human — and therefore, how fallible we can be — we can transform that understanding into actionable empathy. The other becomes a mirror with which we perceive ourselves and realize we are not that different after all.
Happy Global Forgiveness Day!
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Written by @lekzumali
Check out her musings on Instagram!
